Allopregnanolone

This article suggest a low dose of Prozac, only 2mg, can treat PMDD by increasing allopregnanolone levels. 
http://www.abc.net.au/catalyst/stories/3251902.htm

I did notice the biggest increase in mood swings/snappiness/aggression when i stopped taking the progesterone pessaries, a year after i stopped the oestrogen implant. So i think both oestrogen and progesterone, together, helped my PMDD. Oestrogen increases serotonin, leading to less depression. And progesterone is calming (it gets converted to allopregnanolone), leading to less violent mood swings. Progesterone is a tricky hormone for women to take tho, as it often has side-effects. Even tho it was natural progesterone i was taking, the delivery to the body is unnatural, as it's a big dose at once, in one area of the body (pessaries in my case). I did get irritable when i started taking progesterone but the sedating effect also calmed me and the irritability usually went away after a few days. I think it helped dampen my migraines too.

Another shitty month!

Can really notice the difference now, being off the oestrogen implant :( Finding it so hard to concentrate for the entire 3 weeks of luteal phase, both on personal life and work. End up surfing the net instead of watching&relaxing tv in evenings, then realise it's ten pm and i've been faffing all evening and still feel wired. Feel angry that i'm going out, if have plans during the week because it feels so exhausting. Feel angry at wk colleagues all the time and cant really contain it when it gets to a week before period onwards :( Had massive fight with my manager and was anxious and tearful for a week afterwards. And my migraines have been horrendous. Had one every day for 3 weeks... then a 2 week gap, then yesterday (day 2) and today had a really awful one that made me almost throw up and hot and cold and weak and sick throughout body at times :( Have also gone home coz of migraines 3x in the last month or two and am a bit worried as my manager is probably monitoring everything i do since he keeps asking me what i'm doing everyday. So it's come at the worst time... I have had the extra stress of buying a flat to contend with but i think this is probably not the whole story :( The fight with manager didn't help either. So now i'm probably going to lose my job, as i find it hard to get focussed on anything.

I'm not sure if the testosterone implant caused the migraines, as they started the same month. They seem to be worst during period and in the luteal phase tho, but not in luteal phase which is weird. My cycle is messed up too, i used to have a 5 week cycle but now it's gone to 6.5 weeks and 6 weeks. That might be because oestrogen is still in my system and affecting the lining of my womb, i need to have a scan in January. 

Not a great month

This month has been pretty awful (only the first one off progesterone). My period being a week and a half late didn't help. Even having an easy month at work didn't help, so i don't think stress is always a factor.

I have been pro-active and found some very good papers since i last researched PMS, ten years ago. These are definately worth reading:

The below link is a large study and well setup by sounds of it. It found that total oestrogen is the same between PMDD patients and controls but free E2 (oestrodiol) and %free E2 were lower and SHBG higher in PMDD subjects. This makes sense given oestrogen helps mood and oestrogen therapy successfully treated my PMDD for ten years.
http://jcem.endojournals.org/content/93/1/96.full

http://www.ion.ac.uk/information/onarchives/pmsscience

http://books.google.co.uk/books?id=00JbUu4lLsgC&pg=PA298&lpg=PA299&ots=nhLtAO3JF-&dq=serotonin+and+allopregnanolone&output=html_text

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3098121/?report=classic 

Magnesium is still successfully treating my insomnia. It still takes an hour to get to sleep if i go to bed too late but if i got to bed when sleepy/just after taking it, i tend to drop off quickly. I also sleep more deeply on it :)

Day 2

Started ok again and now it's evening i'm really f'ing depressed.... :( Don't know how to get rid of this feeling...I managed to drag myself out of bed, by making waffles and cheese which helped. Emptied washing machine and had a shower and then went to bed...

Finally...!!!

Period was a week and a half late, guess body was adjusting to being off hormones. Started getting moody week before. Had 4 days of cramps before it started. Day 1 started ok but then got migraine before i left work, along with bad mood and followed by cramps. I took painkillers in the car. I took Ashwaghanda and pheremones when i got home. The Ashwaghanda helped, made me feel stoned. And i felt better when it wore off. Sleepy. Hope day 2 goes better. Deadline tomorrow. Oh joy!!

Symptoms

Someone suggested making a list of the wierdest PMDD symptoms and I think it's a good idea, just so i know what to expect next month. So so far this month i've had:

Neediness
Loneliness
Road Rage/Anger
Tears
Paranoia when stressed
Restlessness - unable to pin down how i feel but unable to focus on anything
Boredom
Struggling to concentrate on work and tv
Need to write more  - both in texts and blogging (i remember my emails get much longer from before the HRT)
Depression - Mild, tempered by the fact i've bought a flat which is a happy moment in my life (however the news that my mortgage had been approved cheered me up for approximately 20 mins, thats all)
Sudden starvation attacks late afternoon (even after eating - perhaps dark chocolate isn't such a good afternoon snack in the 2 days preceding my period)
Food cravings - for gherkins
Woozy feeling in brain - like a dizziness/floaty/detached sort of feeling or like the level of some neurotransmitter was increasing...is the best way i can describe it.
Withdrawal from the world - markedly less interest in going out/usual activities
Lack of motivation
Sleepiness/yawning
Insomnia - a couple of times
Higher sex drive
Mild Anxiety
Pyschological feeling of nausea (not in stomach, stronger)
Sore throat/mouth ulcers
IBS&nausea
Migraines
Knee joint pain?

I guess some of these symptoms may be being triggered by the stress of buying a flat, combined with my period being late. I've highlighted the ones that I think will be my biggest problem, most of which have returned only since stopping progesterone. I'm struck by the similarity of these particular symptoms with Borderline Personality traits. I wonder how many women with PMDD, actually have Borderline Personality Traits that just get more pronounced in the luteal phase. And i wonder if my period is putting me in touch with these feelings in an attempt to heal myself? And to heal emotional pain, is to be with that pain, and identify the thoughts that cause them, long enough to process the emotions.

Confessions of a Lunatic

The crimson tide is 4 days late and i'm starting to worry..  as my symptoms aren't very pronounced or frequent. It was suggested that it's lateness could be down to the Lunar Eclipse. I haven't read much into this but have been recommended this page:
http://www.aquariuspapers.com/

I've been craving gherkins a lot and getting sudden starvation 'attacks' the last two days. Along with fuzzy migraines which don't develop into a migraine - thats a first!! I wonder if all the dark chocolate, fat and protein i've eaten this month has helped? My mood was pretty good this week, except getting road rage twice. Unfortunately Enfield is home to many dangerous drivers, and i flipped the finger twice at a couple of impatient nobsters. Breath. Breath deeply.

Here's hoping my monthly friend arrives in the next hour before i drive into the back of someone which i've been temped to do occasionally...